My cousin Calvin's comin into town
we'll talk about wrestling till the sun goes down
he's got a letterman jacket and sells really good pot.
he's got the haircut of a quarterback
he'll grab my arm and twist it behind my back
and demand to hear that I'm much weaker than him.
My cousin's mother is my father's sister
and they disapprove of my life choices
my cousin's father demands to hear
why I never learned to throw a football.
and one day after I start workin out
with a needle in my arm that I found in my high school gym coach's locker.
I'll knock him to the fucking ground
I'll get a trophy with my name on it.
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